Parvathi akka – A biography -06

Parvathi akka’s death

Parvathi had a fairly good collection of silver and jewelry. She never wore any jewelry except a gold chain which at one time had a locket in which was her husband's photo and a coral chain. She wore her diamond ear rings for a long time.She kept her husband's diamond ear rings -I should not say, she kept because she never took charge of anything, my mother possessed on her behalf - and at some point, I can not recall when she gave me one of the diamonds. She used to have silver tumbler which she was attached to, perhaps Balan used it. She had an eating silver plate and T do not know what happened to this and many other articles. What would all these have meant to her? They were her memories in material form; she was deprived of them as she was of her entire life. Fate deprived her of happiness, and mankind denied her possessions - not that it wouod have made much of a difference to her- The income that she derived from her lands, my father kept a separate account and on his death, her other brother took over. The house adjoining CRK's, 1 think the number is 35, is said to have been purchased from the accumulations of her income. It is sad that no one, not even rny mother thought of establishing a marriage hall or a sort of vocational training place for destitute widows instead of extracting rental income from pigeon holes. Of course, that is also charity - how many families are benefited, who would otherwise have been without a roof over their heads!
Much before her soul escaped from her corporeal body, Parvathi was dead- If life is 60 minutes there are only five minutes of joy and the rest is misery. Some how Man being such a Alpa Santhoshi - I can not find an appropriate English equivalent - he classifies his life as happy times and difficult times in equal proportion. For Parvathi the happy moments of her life were perhaps a few fleeting seconds. Her soul was scorched, her heart was burnt, her mind was incinerated, and yet she moved about. My father was afraid of hurting her. He was feared by all others except Parvathi. She replied to him as only she could have- My father never took offence at this.
Her end was as if she relived her life in microcosm. She was stringing flowers till late into the night under the hurricane lamp Perhaps at the end she got up and before going to bed teased the wick and poured oil for the Kutthu Vilakku that was kept burning all through the day and night in the Puja area at Cadavasa! At that moment she must have fallen down in an attack of her fits and as she fell either she dragged the wick on to herself or a spark ignited her saree, The latter is not possible as cotton saree’s do not bum like man made fibre. My mother said that when she woke up in the night, she saw Parvathi on the floor, tried to wake her up and then covered her with a blanket. The next morning Parvathi's body was well cooked. ] think this was on 14 February 1983. My mother and Parvathi were in Cadavasal all by themselves. She called for a car, I am not sure whether if was the family car or a car from one of the neighbor's - and took her to Mayiladuthruai. The blanket allowed the heat to be retained and the body was cremated in smoldering fire. She left her body or whatever remained of it behind on 16 February 1983. In her life my mother was the Agni that surrounded her and protected her. In her death also my mother was the stoker of the fire though inadvertently. I heard of her death in Muscat.
For my mother the dividing line in her memory was Parvathi's death. Her mind gradually died in her.



CDL Sisters from L-R : Parvathi, Savithri, Alamelu

Parvathi had a great sense of the present. My father used to have a Muslim client. Whatever my father said, he will respond " saridhanga, adhu satidhanga" ( right, it is right), She christened him Sarithanga Rowther, a name only by which he was known to us. She named a Sasthri (purohit) Garlic Sasthri because he used to like Garlic. There was another Sasthri whom she called "Uah,uah Sasthri" This sasthri was a sama vedhi and samaveda mantras had extended intonations like "ahah uuu aah" etc. She had a great time much to the discomfiture of Kichan lyengar and Muthurakku (Muniyandi's daughter) who is said tro have held on to Kichan lyengar thinking he was a burglar during Savtlhri's wedding or some such occasion . She laughed loud and instantaneously sensing the run in a situation but the laughter died as it started suddenly. It was almost like her life - a short period of flaming happiness suddenly snuffed out. Was she conscious that she stopped laughing suddenly - I do not know but it is possible, she was. She might have believed she had no right to laughter and fun, given the curse that settled on her
As long as I live I will remember Akka, as I have always addressed her. According to her there were two CRP's in the family ie herself C R Parvathi and myself C R Papa. She used to be very proud when I got some vettiver or Marukkozhundhu from my visits home. That was all that I could do for her. I have her husband's diamond ear ring made into a ring. I want to create awareness among those who had seen her and those who have not of what she was. I do not know how to do it. Parvatbi lived as a reduce while alive, there is no need for her not to be known to the members of the family when she is dead. Endowments are not the answer since over a period of time the purpose is forgotten and the money is taken by someone. Life is too short to be concerned with what will happen long terms. I am trying to establish an endowment in a hospital the income from which is to be used for treating indigent burn victims(s). I hope this will satisfy Parvathi. For the papers I need details of her husband and; her own life in brief but the present head of the Cadavasal clan: is neither aware not interested in investigating. Unfortunately, I am a prisoner in USA and I do not know if I will ever be able to find the data.
I often wonder what Parvathi was atoning for in her last life. She must have paid twice over for any sin she must have committed. Had she been educated, had she lived in a metropolitan city, had she not become a teen widow -who has the answers!
What might have been is an abstraction, Remaining a perpetual possibility Only in a world of speculation.